The central foundation of parts work is that we each have within us a Self with a capital S. There are many names for this, Higher Self ,Wise Mind, Unconditional Love Christ or Buddha Self. This is not religious in any way but an aspect of who we are. I sometimes call at the Core Essence Self Or CES. Some may call it the Diamond within. Throughout the writing I will call it the Self with a capital S.
Having access and developing connection with this is crucial. Many do this through meditation, being in nature, or simply focusing on love.
The beginning of Parts work starts by accessing this Self energy. Being in Self energy and inviting it to be present in the work. In other words the Self energy is going to be holding unconditional love toward the part during the entire process.
Following is the process:
The person identifies an awareness of something they may be activated by. We often call this a trigger or a trailhead.
The next step is to discover where in the body there is a physical sensation related to this emotion. It may be physically sensed in the body, heard as a “voice,” seen as an image or even felt around the body somewhere.
Once it is found, this is identified as the location of the part
The person first asks, “ How I do I feel toward this sensation, voice or image?” Usually the answer to that question might be something like: “I’m annoyed by it,” or “I want it to go away.” When this is the case, we ask the one that is annoyed or wants it to go away what it wants us to know about that sensation or “part,” and also reassure it that whatever the reactive one or ones express makes sense. Once this reactive part feels fully heard, it is respectfully asked if it would step back a bit so that we can get to know the original part.
The person then can ask the original or “target part” what it would like us to know about itself?
Anything this part articulates is acceptable. Often it may sound or feel weird. Stick with it.
Once any reactive parts have relaxed in relation to this part, we again ask our Selves how we feel toward this “target part.” Once the person is “in Self” (meaning that any other parts that are reactive to this part have stepped back to allow us to get to know it), the Self then expresses a certain quality or qualities of the Self that Schwartz calls the eight Cs. These include:
Compassion
Clarity
Curiosity
Confidence
Connectedness
Creativity
Courage
Calmness
The Self just naturally extends one or more of these qualities to the part that has just spoken once it has heard and reassured any reactive parts. For example, Self might feel compassion toward that part that has just told us what it wants us to know. Self expresses its compassion toward this part and continues this for as long as feels right inside.
The next step is to ask the part how it is experiencing the energy of compassion. The part shares how it is receiving or sometimes rejecting this energy. Any reaction that the part expresses is validated by Self.
The Self then ask this part if there's anything else it wants to say. The part then says whatever it wants to say as the Self continues to hold space. This process described here can be repeated as often as needed.
With each response from the part the Self continues by sending out one or more of the eight C's to the part and listens for how this is experienced by the part.
This is repeated until the part feels complete. Depending on the type of part one is working with (it could be a protective part or a vulnerable part), this part is either asked more about its job (if it is a protective part) and who inside it is protecting, or if it is carrying an emotional burden. If this is the case, the part is then given the choice as to whether or not it would like to release this burden.
If the part says yes then it is asked if it would like to release the burden to one of the four elements: air, fire, water, earth (or if there is any other way that would feel just right to the part).
The part then visualizes how it would like to release the burden to that element or process. This is done completely “inside” and the part can take as much time as it needs to complete this sacred process.
Once this is complete the part is asked if there are qualities it would like to invite into the space inside that the burden was occupying. Some examples include: Confidence,Humor. Courage, Playfulness, Love, Tenacity, or any other positive qualities the part would like to now embody. The part is then asked if it would like any of the other parts that function as its protectors, or any other parts that might be impacted by the healing that has just taken place, would like to come and check out how this part has transformed. Because we are all comprised of an internal system of parts within us, these parts have relationships with one another and any changes in the system will affect the whole.
This completes the process.
The following is a brief description but more detail and theory can be found in Tanis Allen's book titled, "The Self -Led Internal Family Systems Workbook." This is subtitled, "Learn IFS Skills to Understand and Love all your Parts."
This book is designed for both lay people and for therapists. To understand and use this process more deeply Tanis Allen's book is recommended as it includes examples and cautions and guidelines to make this powerful work safe.
IFS is a therapeutic model that views the mind as comprised of multiple parts with distinct roles and personalities, all working within a larger Self. This modality was developed by Richard Schwartz in the 1980s.